BFFs Need Not Apply
Happy Birthday Markdon! Come back from Korea already so we can indulge in some heavy drinking, poker and RBs. Oh wait. Railing bitches is not my thing. Maybe just heavy drinking and poker? We can start with the beer you left in my fridge.
Mondays suck in general. Mondays suck even more when the first exchange of the day is as follows:
BFF2: Help! Am meeting his ex. In dire need of wardrobe choices.
MOI: Yawn.
BFF2: Mani-pedi afternoon?
MOI: HISS….
BFF2: Tag-along, then?
MOI: Sign me up for a bikini wax.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I find pouring hot wax down my thigh and getting the short and curlies ripped off preferable to hanging out with certain kinds of women. Maybe it’s because I already had my girl time this weekend. Femming up is best done alone, in my opinion. Case in point, this weekend’s mall time successfully resulted in some new M.A.C. electric blue shadow and autobody red gloss, ironically from the Barbie collection. I’ve also revived the glam goth look I loved so much in college and donned my tips and toes in dark purple. (Needless to say, Garbage is at the top of my playlist again.) But doing these things with gasp…another woman?!?! Girl, you be triflin’!
Don’t get me wrong. I have wonderful, female friends.(Version 2.0!) It’s just that they aren’t needy or trivial. I have a lot of fun hanging out with them or at dance or volleyball. I even watch the quintessential girly soap, Grey’s Anatomy, with a lovely bunch of women who have over active tear ducts. But you won’t see me setting my hair on fire after a night in with them. Seriously.
I just find it painful to have to invest time in the above-mentioned plans when go-kart racing, Wii-ing (ROB!), and discussing the pros and cons of Congress proposing an Air Traveler’s Bill of Rights await me. (Stimulate my intellect and I will love you forever!) Drinks with the boys means incessant bitching is non-existent and there is no hair to hold back when they yak. Why then, are we expected to stick with our own gender when it comes to choosing friends? I’m not buying it. I feel like I got the shoddy end if this deal.
Maybe the question I really should be asking myself is, “How do I get rid of BFF number 2?”
